Smile Pretty for Your Panic Attack

When Mark and I first got engaged, I wanted to dive into everything wedding! And in this day and age of over-sharing on the internet (please see my post about The Pressures of Pinterest) it is a pretty deep pool to dive into. But I was sure that it was water I could tread. I was determined to keep my mind while wedding planning, right? (No need to rub my nose in previous posts about losing my mind. I remember writing them as much as I remember experiencing them!)

One of the things I was initially really excited about was getting engagement pictures taken. And because we have chosen INCREDIBLE photographers, it should be super fun and a piece of cake, right?

Maybe.

Perfect Engaged Couple

See, I’m not really sure yet. It’s almost time for our engagement pictures and I’ve put a ridiculous amount of pressure on myself about this photo shoot. Because that’s what it has become in my mind. A photo shoot. Which makes me think of models and make-up artists and wind machines and craft services.

No? Is that not what it will be like? Will there be no wardrobe stylists and no agents? Are Mark and I NOT on America’s Next Top Model?!

I know it’s silly to freak out about this whole ordeal (and also it’s hard to not make it an ordeal!) This is supposed to be a record of the love that Mark and I share, not an audition or anything fake or something stressful. And after stalking…er, checking out, our photographers blog, they do incredible work with their engagement shoots.

OH! That’s another thing. Here’s where my currently crazy mind goes to — what if we’re the ONE couple who does not look adorable in their engagement pics?! What if they can’t seem to capture us in that oh-so-casual-laugh and the super-cute look of love that so effortlessly passes between two people so clearly in love?!

HUH!?! WHAT IF THAT HAPPENS?????

I mean, no pressure Adam and Laura, but if you, as the gifted, genius, incredible photographers that you are, can’t capture the love that Mark and I share — does that mean we’re doomed? Does it? DOES IT?

It’s a damn good thing I’ve mastered this panic-attack-smile. I hope it comes in handy during our upcoming spread in People magazine, circulation 3.5 million. Er….or in the pics we’ll share with those we love most, circulation unknown but each and every one someone we love deeply and who loves us enough to look past the crazy eyes and focus on the special time we are sharing.

At least that’s the hope I’m currently diving into.

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